You reminded me
death is a part of life
itself even as we live.
Winter has always been my
favorite, February feels free
somehow, full of ancients’
magic for its calm, its stunned
beauty
even in death. I keep hearing you
knock, knock, knocking on my dreams,
death opening the door toward
life, it’s all too much.
Talk less, listen to the breath
shifting snowdrifts
silencing, the way snow will,
anger with nowhere to go.
Echoes bounce off ice like
laser beams, lives lived, lives
fragmenting life. You said
yourself all things must
pass
like you, an emptiness,
loss of light, another shifting
phase of the new
blue moon hovering,
haunting, but true.
You pass on your traits,
memories and mercy to a
fistful of your own blood
we all wish we carried
for another chance,
the do-overs.
For you, out of you,
tired of you, deep go the
blues.
They come again and again,
no time or space, but a long,
long, long way to go. I’m
surprised by how much
I need you, not knowing, but
knowing you. A dream
scene knocks again,
one I’ve had before or I
think I have. I want
to tell you about the
impact, blue waves
sliding up the shore.
But you reminded me with a
word, a glance, a blunt
warning to handle
with care, the love so
sad for this song, this
tongue of the gods, a charged
mystical one, not a dirty
word, even when many were said.
Duality splits in
half
again, and I’m not
alone anymore. The fears
death bring remind us
of all those years
ago when your tears
met your mouth.
When I was younger,
I used to want
everything and fast. Slow
down to imagine what
is life when we finally
see the answer’s at
the end, the art
of dying, having
both
and knowing both
feels right, no longer
rattled, afraid. If not for
you, I may not
remember the way. Even
patient, it’s taken me
longer to find the inner
light than the
darkness, but to my
surprise, it’s been here
all along, as you knew.
I am shoveling
snow into my grief-filled
heart to share a bit more of
you since I can only
run so far for so long,
blanketing all that anger with
February-fabricated calm,
beauty, something close to
peace.
So I can try, I can
imagine heading for the
light, and I want to
thank you for the reminder.