"Bad News in Plain English" by Sebastian Hunter

Everyone was purely jazzed about

the sun disappearing for three minutes.

In her absence, the day went

completely saturnine. Nobody’s hearts

were lackadaisical, and abandoned cruise ships

capsized meaninglessly in the harbor. If we weren’t

so indifferent, this would have spelled out

bad news in plain English. Everyone

was perfectly chuffed about local sports,

over which we shot death threats at our enemies

in adjacent townships. We celebrated the solstice

with the burning of antique furniture

and the inhalation of fumes that allowed us

to look into the past and realize

that marriage was never in the cards,

that the riverbanks would overflow

and wash our homes into the sea,

where we would learn, in time, to swim,

and look beautiful while doing so.

Sebastian Hunter is a writer and musician from Seattle. He makes maps for a living and reads books the rest of the time. He is published or forthcoming in Bombfire and Boats Against the Current.