"Biting Back" & "The Nature of a Wall" by Adele Evershed

Biting Back

When I was five I bit a boy / he had followed me down the slide / pinned my arms / and tried to kiss me / the teacher seeing the bloody marks / never asked for my words / she just gave me the ruler / and as it was picture day / my mother had to pay for a photo of me scowling / and missing the bow from my hair / the boy was cooed over and consoled / but at least my resistance was branded on his cheek 

When I was thirteen a boy bit me / and called it love / we danced to Chanson D’Amour / and he told me / everything sounded better in French / then he sucked my neck / a would be vampire / before they were sexy / my frenemies seeing the bruise / soft and harsh as muslin / shook me with bullets / slut / tart / skank / the bite disappeared / but the scars from the words never faded

When I was twenty-one I bit my lip / as I followed my mother’s coffin / through the fug of white lilies / and purple shrugs / the taste of blood / clung to my words / why her / it’s not fair / and there is no God / still the sunflowers / in the garden of remembrance / coddled hope / so I rinsed my words / over and over again / trying to get rid of the stains

When I was thirty I bit my tongue / as another prince turned into a frog / the blood bubbled up / but this time I gaged as I tried to swallow / and in the swirl I tasted all my rage / what else was there to do / but spit out all those red globby words / and as I walked away / as free as the day moon / my last words—bite me / fell like cherry blossoms  / or a long forgotten truth

The Nature of a Wall

Slipping into Stop and Shop / slush in the groove of me / I am greeted by an orange pyramid / a sunshine triangle / in which to lose any lingering winter blues / arranged like a puzzle / it dazzles / and dares me to take just one 

I am reminded of a book / from my library years / when all it took to banish the season / was an afternoon gulping down words / well before my thighs resembled dimpled peel / and when I was still sweet enough to think / most people were good

Oranges are Not the Only Fruit / a book squashed full / of pips and pith / about a lesbian / in a religious family / the mother wanted to exorcise the gay out of her / so she starved her daughter / in their best parlor / it’s the sort of book that might be banned here 

But in Britain it was put on the school syllabus / so we got to discuss / the juicy symbolism / of an orange demon / or the power of a pebble / to guide you home / and one idea wound its way around me / the nature of a wall / is to fall

Leaving the supermarket / I find it difficult to balance my plastic bag / on my arm / it swings back and forth / like a worry  / and then barring my way / a perky Big City Big Dreams Barbie / brought to life / in Wilton Connecticut 

She wants me to donate / to the Republican candidate for President / that orange fruitcake / I tell her that orange is not the only fruit / as I take one out / and drop it in her bucket / suddenly she becomes undone / calling me a name I’m surprised she knows

Other people / skirt around her / as if it’s 2021 and she’s not wearing a mask / a woman with a child / even tells her she’s a disgrace / like her candidate / and weird Barbie snarls about how he built a wall / to make America great again

I tell her about the nature of a wall / and as she packs her stuff to leave / people cheer / and I feel a ray of warmth / maybe next election / we will realize / America was always a fruit salad / and that’s what makes her great 

Adele Evershed is a Welsh writer who now lives in America. You can find her poetry and prose in Grey Sparrow Journal, Anti Heroin Chic, Gyroscope, Janus Lit, and many other places. Adele has been nominated for the Pushcart Prize for poetry and short fiction and Best of the Net for poetry. Finishing Line Press published her first poetry chapbook, Turbulence in Small Places. Her second collection, The Brink of Silence is available from Bottlecap Press. Her first novella-in-flash, Wannabe, was published by Alien Buddha Press in 2023 and her short story collection Suffer/Rage (Dark Myth Publisher) has just been published after Adele won the Open Contract Challenge.