Broken Toys
I blamed myself for every broken toy
Back when I was a kid
And now I find out how fucked up that was
How a brain skewers a person
As I attempt not to cry into the webcam.
Way We’ve Always Been
There is an ungraspable sting
to seeing unloved personality traits
in your children
Knowing you’ve never figured out
ways to dampen your impatience
The beauty of their faces
shines like beacons
even through crowds of kids
I wonder how their features will change
figuring I’ll still see them this way
For how many generations is this how we’ve behaved?
Who were the wordsmiths among my ancestry?
Immigrants two generations removed
Earned the rights of restless natives now
Facsimiles of people gone before
with different last names
and places to call home
I call you two home
Try as I might
I can’t help but get frustrated
that the attention lavished
cannot meet the amount craved
Know too well
the time will come
when I’m banished
as nothing more than
an embarassment.
The Things Easily Forgotten
Feel a hand
Ripping at the base of your heart
and the pit of your stomach
The dozen of us asking
The same unanswerable question
What more we could’ve done
for someone who didn’t want the help
We drink to the best of us
The sweetest and kindest
Who yearned for the things we have
Even when he possessed
So much more than we could imagine
Tonight, we are each other’s
Emotional support peacocks
Clinging with laughter and tears
to the side of the cargo hold
Remembering things easily forgotten
Conjuring useless memories
That we never wanted to keep
No use for the internet
Except endless trivial queries
Carefully worded
To navigate algorithms
Steering us through a perceived life
The beginning of a life
Truly is the easy part
Reconciling an end
So bitter, so early
Unwarranted
the hardest part
Forgiving yourself
In the face of death
Takes a lifetime to do.
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